Tales from the Borderlands

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This game has the classic borderlands look and some awesome writing. One of my favorite telltale games and one of my favorite borderlands games. Well worth playing at least once.

[h3] You're Cordially Invited to My Thoughts on Tales from the Borderlands B**CH [/h3] Okay so Tales from the Borderlands is gooood and if you disagree I will shank a b**ch. It be just livin' in the Borderlands world all casual-like, like them fine Fallout show, with vaults and stuff, which, valid, ten outta ten, explosivos. Just bein' all "oh haiiii" at you like it ain't got a care in the whole entire world. And THEN — and THEN — Chapter 2 shows up and goes psych, here's lore, here's feelings, here's EVERYTHING you didn't ask for that but it's too late you already got em. Cry about it. Cry cry cry. I don't see tears! CRY! And the people moving. LISTEN. Close-ups on faces the whoooole time, just two heads floatin' at each other goin' blahhh blahhhh, which, I get it, animating the whole badonkadonk situation costs mucho skinjobs and Hyperion stoled it all anyway. BUT. You are watchin' this game waaaay more than you are playin' it. Like Roland used to make us do drills — rest his sweet beautiful brudder-face — and I woulda rather done every single one of those drills TWICE than not be playin' Tales, that is how much watchin' there is. So when the visuals hit or they mid you feeeeel it in your whole badonkadonk in a way you wouldn't in a shooty bang game. They also reuse the same rooms every episode. Saaame rooms. SAAAAAAME ROOMS. I once ran a whole tea party then Salvardor went all bang bang on psychos and they all look the same and nobody said nothin' so I GET IT Telltale I GET IT but also COME ON. The jokes though. Ohmygodohmygod THE JOKES. They all prophetic and stuff, shorty and I ain't sayin' what because spoilers and I RESPECT a good bit, okay, I RESPECT IT. But if you seen Deadpool 2 — and you SHOULD have seen Deadpool 2, go watch it, go, WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE — you gonna get to a moment in Tales and go OH. And then you gonna look around and there ain't nobody there and that is just how it be sometimes. That's a poem. Liiittle reason to replay it unless you marathonin' with ya'z people, which, valid, I done longer for worse, don't ask. But you gettin' a story. A reeeeal one. Best day evaaaa. One of Telltale's best before the whole thing went boom and not the fun kinda boom. The sad kinda boom. Seriously though. Tales from the Borderlands. That's fo' life. Stop readin'. GO.