Staffer Case: A Supernatural Mystery Adventure

This is a once in a generation game. I am coming off a string of lackluster games and all my complaints that puzzles weren’t well-tuned or the characters weren’t interesting look so quaint now. Where I thought other developers were inadequate, this developer flips the script, and has actively worked to create the worst possible functional game and it is incredible. Hey, want an incredibly text-heavy game that relies on nuance and turns of phrase to guide you through an investigation? Eat poop crickets! You will get an incredibly text-heavy game that was localized by insane people and you will enjoy it. Imagine: spending a good 10-15 minutes trying to figure what this “workshop” that one of the clues keeps mentioning is, only to learn that it was the shed, which is only ever referred to as a shed, and does not contain any tools or work equipment :). Gone are the dialog trees or investigations or the clues or the environments that are actually meaningful that scores of ace attorney clones have improved on or just straight copied. Instead, you get like 5-7 pieces of paper and you can shove them up your butt because the only investigation mechanic is literally just a pop quiz by the worst teacher you’ve ever had :). There is no humanly possible way to translate at least 50% of the pop quizzes into an actual reasonable question. Which is not to say the mysteries are actually mysterious, no sir. You’ll figure out the mystery within the first 5 minutes, then be extruded through the most agonizing and poorly executed chain of pop quizzes imaginable to get to your ending :). Pop quiz! What is this character’s magic power? I don’t care what your answer is because you’re wrong. All the clues are a lie, but not in a fun “ohhh you got me” way, only in a “rest of the forking owl” way :). Wanna know what this other guy’s power is? You think it’s soaring through the air because that’s what it says on the form listing their powers and the flyer listing their powers? WRONG. Someone said they jump really high in an interview that’s the only correct answer :). Likable, endearing characters? Fun dialog? A reasonable balance between exposition and gameplay? Nahhhhh, they’ve already slipped the fire ants up your butt so you can enjoy: Three sidekicks that all won’t shut the fork up with not an ounce of personality between them. Unless it comes time to actually participate in an investigation, then they’ll randomly just drop their phone in the trash and leave to go get another iced coffee before they destroy the office toilet again :). The magic spork has more character development. This game is a visual novel in the most literal sense - all you see is these three margarine ass characters emit blocks and blocks of text then BAM pop quiz, or if you’re lucky a “here, click that chair and the desk and the window before I give you totally unrelated clues with my magic power :)” interlude. Now that you’ve retreated to the safety of the handful of documents you get in a case, SURPRISE! We gave up actually doing any kind of quality control and the chronological lists are just in whatever order :). The insane localization will only get worse as you go on :). Also one of the characters glamorizes smoking, shame on the developers. and the soundtrack sucks. Muted in 10 minutes.