Alpha Protocol™

I feel scammed. If the intro didn't take so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ long, I would've refunded this. I was going in hoping for a spy game focused on stealth. But for a stealth game, it feels like one made by somebody who's never touched a single stealth game in their lives. This is a 2010 game, how does it feel at least 6 years older than that? Enemies have hair-trigger detection, instant without a millisecond in between. The enemy routes are confusing as ♥♥♥♥. Enemies turn 180 degrees in an instant during patrol, but sometimes they'll stay in one spot for an undetermined amount of minutes before deciding to gain sentience and move again. If you get spotted, the guns are only competent at melee range - at which point just press the melee button. All of this adds up to make this feel like some normal third person game where stealth is an afterthought that you're not actually supposed to take seriously or go far with in any given level.

If you understand Obsidian’s design philosophy, this game is an unmatched masterclass in narrative reactivity. The stance-based dialogue system completely trivializes Mass Effect's superficial illusion of choice. Complaints about janky controls are overstated. Unbelievably, I can’t award this beyond a 9.8/10 due to one creative failure: the utter non-existence of Mario. Imagine replacing Thorton with a tactical Mario infiltrating oligarch safehouses. Picture an agonizing timed dialogue choice where a grizzled Mario must decide whether to neutralize a rogue Toad handler—all while wearing kevlar over his denim overalls. The dramatic tension of an Italian plumber unraveling a global military-industrial conspiracy is a colossal wasted concept. Customizing Thorton’s rifle just leaves me filled with a hollow sorrow that I’m not running covert ops as Nintendo's golden boy.

play it.

YES

Great and creative RPG. Tons of decisions to make, hidden plots to uncover, and an interesting story. Unfortunately, there is a lot of jank and poor game design decisions (like the impossibility of making a full "stealth no kills" run in a spy game). But overall it's enjoyable and original game from the golden era in video games, where developers could make attractive female characters and over-the-top personalities.

Mass Effect if it had good reactivity and was a proper RPG. Really. This is one of the best games Obsidian ever made.