Devlog: A Post-Modern College Experience

Having played the demo in its entirety on steam and twice before from the megalink. I can say that, quite honestly, Devlog does a fine job at pretending to have a good story. What the main chapters have going for it are the dress work: The colorful characters, and the times where numerous sprites are on screen, and many MANY guest appearances of artist styles, and also the large breasts, gives off the AIR that there is something happening but it feels rather empty. I think by a VN’s Sixth chapter, the story ought to make its main issue apparent. From what I can gather, there are three things which bother our main protagonist, Dev Loper: self-doubt, his drunk parents, and his self esteem. Notice how I didn't list Video Game Development, or romance. That's because, over the course of 6 chapters, and around 15 hours of actual reading and game time. No REAL obstacle presents itself on these two issues. Any problem with the team's game development is dealt with instantly, at no sacrifice. Dev does not give anything up, nor is he really changed in any real way. Six chapters in and we really only see Dev cry over the same issues of his parents drinking problem or his self worth. If the game is about Dev’s growth I can only imagine that it happens in tandem with the development of the game. Which we see very little of. A second issue, the character Elliot Reddington is another main source of contention for me. He’s the rich boy of the group who’s a little tight lipped. When he presented his “usefullness” with a paid refurbished shack and all the materials the gang needed for their game. I ask myself why this one thing here couldn't be the main focus of these first six chapters? Is there a gotcha in this seemingly guileless act? Maybe, perhaps that's something to explore in the next chapters I suppose. But here, if the creators of this game wanted a real obstacle for this team to overcome. Why not have them scrap together what they can and create a small alpha of their idea to present to Elliot (or some small creative festival). Hence my issue: Elliot Reddington is, himself, useful only to aid Dev. He has no character so far, other than to be a slight stickler but get the gang what they need. He’s Theo’s roommate (what a coincidence) he’s filthy rich (what a coincidence) and he's amiable to the gang's mission despite his initial position of being stuffy and haughty. It is, in my opinion, a big missed opportunity to have the gang show something of themselves. But that’d require some major rewrites. Which brings me to my next point. The writing comes off, as if I'm reading fanfiction. The tone, rhythm and prose is something I find on AO3. Not a particularly bad thing (as MANY snoot likes have this same character about its writing) but here in such a big project, some effort would be nice to convert this style of writing : “then i did this-i wake up-Theo laughs with his hands across his stomach-” into something that can better work with a visual aspect. With the sprites and art, and such on screen. A lot of what the characters say to either themselves, or to one another, ought to reflect a more natural speech. We the player SEE when the characters laugh, or leave, or fall, or frown. You see, the writing stuffs up our experience with the game by telling us what's happening when it's not really necessary ALL the time. In terms of quality, it's passable. I can’t remember a time when I felt the scene could've been cut short, except maybe some of Hawthorn's class or Joblinksys, perhaps even some stuff where Dev is just thinking to himself. A lot of characters actually, tend to just exposit. There aren’t many times when dev figures something out on his own in regards to any of the characters. Everyone is introduced clearly, and with little mystery. The writing helps to sit these characters into neat little holes. Which makes for easy digesting, but not for much engrossing. I kinda wanted to just get through the scene most times. (though that can be chalked up to my having played this demo twice before). An example I can pull from which carries all these aforementioned issues would be the Emily route in chapter 6. After beating all the carney games (done NOT in the games usual style. For reasons. I'm sure.) Emily laments: “Nothing. I can’t do anything right.” and goes on to say “People just look at me like an obstacle or an Idiot.” Excuse me? Where is this coming from? Emily is the second girl we’re introduced to; a whole chapter before Abigail. And not once does Dev, or WE, see anything like this. It's very sudden, Dev doesn't point that (which is strange because when it comes to emotional one-on-ones he's the very bestest. He’s a natural at diffusing tough conversations.) There's this issue here that we’re not getting a full picture of Emily's situation. And if she's a LOVE interest and an important character we’re gonna need more than just a small scuffle in a shack to show us these deep confidence issues she's got. It isn't enough that she's quiet. Six chapters in and we don't know WHY she's that way. 9 hours give or take and we get NOTHING of any character growth or vulnerability except right at (what is essentially) the finish line.The same can be said of Abigail's route. And Rebecca is favoured by the creators and so gets a much more nuanced route(ending without an Eloquent Dev pep-talk). In its trailer, When the game says “Manage a chaotic team” we do none of that, the team is fairly mild mannered. When the game says “Handle brutal deadlines” there are none. Elliot never puts his foot down in any way that gets the team to get something done, and in that same chapter they GO TO A CARNIVAL. When the game says ‘try to keep your sanity” there's no major obstacle which pushes Dev to a breaking point. If this was my first visual novel (beyond SG and Wani) I'd say Shut-In studios did a magnificent job in copying those two games but putting enough of a twist on the premise that I had not noticed. But this is not my first visual novel. It isn't even my first dino anthro VN on steam. In conclusion, this ought to have remained a mega link. And even just a proof of concept of a general premise. My advice to SiS; go back to the drawing board, and give us at least two more full chapters (not any Bonus Chapter BS) to flesh out the girls further and give the gang a REAL conflict. Because it seems like everything's fine. Dev’s making headway with a girl, the game has a HQ, the group is stronger than ever, and Elliot is still rich. Nothing on the horizon could really spell doom for the group even so much as hints itself. Shut-In studios has not learned much in these past two years of development. Id recommend this game ONLY so aspiring studios can play and learn from the strange creative decisions this game makes. And from here on out I'll be suspicious of anyone (esp the big names in the snoot community) who’d say this demo is the greatest thing ever.