The Dead Tree of Ranchiuna

This is my review of The Dead Tree of Ranchtuna. I was pretty on board with this game until I saw the flowers. You have, strewn at random upon an otherwise-barren steppe, domestic tulips, coneflowers, hibiscus, and phlox, all blooming at the same time. These do not all bloom in the same season, or even thrive in the same climates. Then later, there are vining geraniums attached to a building, surrounded by ivy. On what planet does that make sense? The graphics in Ranchtuna are generally better than other contemporary TB games, but that doesn't fix these issues. Another case in point about the nonsense of this game: skeletons physically cannot hang by the neck. It doesn't work. Try it sometime. I guess I should be somewhat charitable here, so I will also say that at least the narrator's voice acting wasn't as bad as the rest of the cast. That was a relief. Also, certain parts of the soundtrack were decent, though the game was mostly void of music or any other interesting sounds. The flip side of these points is that the [strike]Mary Sue[/strike] main character is a slouchy man in a hoodie. Something about this doesn't quite complete the "hero" circuit in my brain. I feel like I should have more to say about a gaming experience that was 2.2 hours long, but I really don't this time. Auto-walk. Right. Thank goodness for auto-walk. TB: please start putting this in more of your games. It makes them much easier to play. For some stretches of the game, I can play with no hands, in fact. Well, that was my review of The Dead Tree of Ranchtuna. It's too long, but at least the achievements are easy to get.