Neverwinter

Neverwinter: A Love Letter to Loading Screens ★★★☆☆ (3.5 stars, rounded down out of spite) Let me start by saying I've put more hours into Neverwinter than I have into most of my personal relationships, and honestly, the game deserves at least partial custody of my weekends. The Good: It's Dungeons & Dragons, but somebody removed the part where you argue with Steve about whether his homebrew warlock subclass is "balanced." No Steve. No arguments. Just you, a companion who's basically a Roomba with a sword, and an endless parade of loot that ranges from "life-changing" to "vendor trash, but the game insists you inspect it first anyway." The combat feels good. Smashing goblins as a Great Weapon Fighter has the same satisfying crunch as bubble wrap, if bubble wrap occasionally dropped a purple item. The Bad: The economy is run by what I can only assume is a caffeinated squirrel with a spreadsheet. One day Astral Diamonds are currency, the next they're a distant memory, like your will to grind Tower of the Mad Mage for the ninth time hoping RNGesus smiles upon you. Also, the zone chat. I have seen things in zone chat. Things that cannot be unseen. Things that make me wonder if some of these people have ever left their basements, let alone Neverwinter Wood. The Ugly: The cash shop looks at you the way a used car salesman looks at a lottery winner. "Oh, you want that mount? That's just 3,000 Zen, which is only $30, which is only slightly more than what you paid for the game that was supposedly free." Final Verdict: Neverwinter is what happens when someone takes "Dungeons & Dragons" and "please give us your credit card number" and mashes them together with surprising competence. I'd recommend it to anyone who enjoys fantasy combat, questionable UI decisions, and slowly realizing they've spent four hours doing dailies for a mount they'll use twice. Would grind again. 🐉💸