Hitler is my crush

Overall Verdict: Mostly Negative (but ironically Overwhelmingly Positive) Hours Played: 1.2 (I tried to refund it, but Steam Support just sent me a question mark) Look, we’ve all been there. It’s 3:00 AM during the Steam Summer Sale, you have $1.99 left in your digital wallet, and your friends dare you to buy the most unhinged game on the storefront. Enter Hitler is My Crush, a visual novel/dating sim that feels less like a video game and more like a fever dream you’d have after eating expired schnitzel. I went in expecting a cheap laugh. I came out with a profound sense of bewilderment. Here is the breakdown of my deeply regrettable experience. The "Plot" (And I Use That Word Loosely) You play as a generic, unvoiced anime protagonist who gets sucked into a time machine made out of a toaster and ends up in 1930s Europe. Your mission? Not to stop World War II, but to distract the most notorious dictator in history by trying to date him. The writing is spectacular—and by spectacular, I mean it was clearly translated through Google Translate roughly fourteen times. Half the time, the dialogue doesn't even match the character sprites. At one point, you try to compliment his mustache, and the text box just says: "BREAD IS WARM IN THE WINTER, SENPAI." Gameplay & Mechanics If you enjoy interactive clickers where none of the clicks matter, this is your Elden Ring. The core gameplay loop involves gifting him items to raise his "Affection Meter." Best items to gift: A fresh canvas, a rejection letter from art school (triggers a secret crying animation), and strangely, a modern-day fidget spinner. Bugs: The game is held together by duct tape and sheer audacity. During the pivotal "coffee date" scene, his character model suddenly T-poses, slowly levitates through the ceiling, and the screen cuts to black while royalty-free jazz plays on a loop. I had to force-quit through the Task Manager. Audio & Visuals The developer clearly blew their entire budget ($12) on the title screen art, because everything else is a blatant asset flip. The backgrounds are literal watermarked stock photos of random German castles and, for some unexplained reason, a modern IKEA food court. The soundtrack consists of exactly two songs: A deeply compressed accordion track. An 8-bit dubstep remix of Beethoven's 9th Symphony that plays every time you make a "flirty" dialogue choice. It is deafening. The Verdict Score: 10/10 for the group chat memes. 0/10 for human sanity. Hitler is My Crush is a masterpiece of digital garbage. It is wildly inappropriate, historically inaccurate to a baffling degree, mechanically broken, and visually painful. Do I recommend it? Absolutely not. Will I be gifting it to all my friends for their birthdays just to ruin their Steam algorithms? Yes. Yes, I will. Pros: It costs less than a cup of coffee. It will make you appreciate literally any other game in your library. The T-pose glitch made me laugh so hard I spilled my drink. Cons: Explaining this in your Steam library to your family. The UI gave me a migraine. I am now on a watchlist.

缺少引导，可以说是用脚抠出来的，我知道这是在整活，但你好歹有点质量，这款游戏就是很差，有太多槽点，搞不懂为什么因为题材和整些烂活就盲目给高分 况且竟然还敢卖6块钱，我不是穷，我觉得这根本不值

insgesamt in ordnung für zwsichendurch. der preiß des spiels ist auch gut.

太好玩了

I wanted to get raped by hitler but sadly there was no hitlar sex. still very fun game to play 10/10 W creator

6块钱恶心一下朋友绝对值得

神秘的游戏，伴随着一些神秘的富有节奏感的音乐，穿着神秘现代装束的女主和一些神秘士兵战斗，女主需要打败很多奇形怪状的神秘敌人（他们也许是德军的神秘生化改造产物，太吓人且神秘了，没有交代的背景令人浮想联翩思绪万千），最后拯救爱人hitler，整个故事非常感人而且神秘。神秘流程比较短，有机会我再品鉴神秘DLC，对这段神秘故事了解更多。唯一的神秘瑕疵我觉得是优化不够好且不够神秘，我的电脑玩第一个神秘场景帧率有点低。

石